R18: Snake Bite and Others

Snake Bite

One day, two best friends named Jay and Bob were walking down a dense forest. Suddenly, a giant snake came out of nowhere, jumped up on Jay’s leg, and bit his dick.

Since there was no one around for miles, Bob called a hospital and told the doctor, “Quick! Help! My friend’s got bitten by a snake on his penis! What should I do?”

The doctor on the line told him, “Son, you’re gonna have to suck the venom out yourself.”

Frantic, Bob said, “But Doctor, there has to be another way to get rid of…

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R18: Blind Man and Others

Blind Man 

The head nun tells the two new nuns that they have to paint their room without getting any paint on their clothes.  So the one nun says to the other, "Hey, let's take all our clothes off, fold them up, and lock the door." 

So they do this, and begin painting their room.  Soon they hear a knock at the door.  They ask, "Who is it?" 

"Blind man!"

The nuns look at each other, then one nun says, "He's blind, he can't see. What could it hurt?"  So they let him in. 

The…

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R18: Weight Loss and Others

Weight Loss

THERE is an overweight guy who is watching TV. A commercial comes on for a fitness program guaranteeing a weight loss of 10 pounds in a week. Intrigued, he decides to sign up.

The next morning, he finds an incredibly beautiful woman standing at his door, wearing nothing but a pair of running shoes and a sign about her neck that reads, "If you can catch me, you can have me." 

As soon as he sees her, she takes off running. He tries to catch her, but is unable. This continues for a week, at the end…

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R18: Birthday Gift and Others

Birthday Gift

THERE is a fellow who is talking to his buddy and says, "I don't know what to get my wife for her birthday. She has everything, and besides, she can afford to buy anything she wants. I'm stumped." 

His buddy says, "I have an idea. Why don't you make up a certificate that says she can have two hours of great sex, any way she wants it. She'll probably be thrilled!" The first fellow does just that. 

The next day, his buddy asks, "Well, did you take my suggestion? How did it turn out?"…

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R18: Wife’s Three Wishes and Others

Wife’s Three Wishes 

A WOMAN was out golfing one day when she hit the ball into the woods. She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap. 

The frog said to her, “If you release me from this trap, I will grant you three wishes." 

The woman did so. After that, the frog continued, “Thank you, but I failed to mention that there was a condition to your wishes – that whatever you wish for, your husband will get ten times more or better!" 

The woman said, "That would be…

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