R18: She's Not Betty Crocker and Others

She’s not Betty Crocker!

A wife was standing in the kitchen cooking dinner while her husband was in the lounge room drinking a beer and watching the game. 

Sure enough, it didn’t take long before she started to nag him about things that needed fixing.  “Honey, you need to come in here and fix the fridge. The door is broke and if you don’t fix it the food will go bad.” 

He yelled back, “Who do I look like, the repair man? I don’t think so!”

A little while later she said, “Honey, you need to fix…

Read more: R18: She's Not Betty Crocker and Others

R18: Nice Try and Others

Nice Try!

ONE day Tom sees Joe's wife naked sunbathing in their backyard. When Tom sees Joe he brags, "I've seen your wife naked."

To get back at him Joe sneaks into Tom's yard the next night and sees his wife performing oral sex. Joe sees Tom a couple of days later and tells him, "Guess what? I saw your wife giving you oral a couple of days ago."

Tom laughs and replies, "Nice try! I wasn't in town a couple of days ago!"

-o0o-

Hazards of a prenup

A man and his wife are having diner when…

Read more: R18: Nice Try and Others

R18: Naked Statue and Others

Naked Statue

TWO old ladies are walking through a museum and got separated.  

When they ran into each other later, the first old lady said to the second, "Oh my! Did you see that statue of the naked man back there?" 

The second old lady replied, "Yes! I was absolutely shocked! How can they display such a thing! My gosh, the penis on it was so large!" 

The first old lady then accidentally blurted out, "...Yeah, and cold, too!"

-o0o-

Washing Machine

Husband and wife decide to make a password for sex, settling for "washing machine."…

Read more: R18: Naked Statue and Others

R18: No Wipes and Others

No Wipes

Two women are walking home from a night at the bar and have to pee, so they stop at a cemetery. With nothing to wipe with, one uses her panties and the other uses a nearby wreath.

The next day one of the women's husbands calls the other. "They are never going out again! My wife came home without panties!"

The other husband replies, "You think that's bad? My wife came home with a card in her crack that said, 'From all of us at the fire station, we will never forget you!'"

-o0o-

Shotgun Marriage

A…

Read more: R18: No Wipes and Others

R18: Wrong Call and Others

Wrong Call

An eight-year old girl went to her grandfather who was working in the yard and asked him, “Grandpa, what is couple sex?”

The grandfather was surprised that she would ask such a question, but decided that if she was old enough to know to ask the question, then she was old enough to get a straight answer.

He proceeded to tell her all about human reproduction and enjoys and responsibilities that go with it. When he finished explaining, the little girl was looking at him with her mouth hanging open, eyes wide in amazement. Seeing the look…

Read more: R18: Wrong Call and Others

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